Saturday, August 9, 2008

Feeling Overwhelmed

I went to my local farm stand today, to buy fresh mozzarella, veggies, and a pie for tonight's dinner. My mother is quite ill, and my brother and sister and their families are coming to discuss some very difficult details. I am trying to keep the visit simple.

My friend who works there said "I saw your name on the invite for the Fall for Art show on the 4th of next month!". Startled I said, "oh yes" and almost had another anxiety attack. In less than a month I have to be ready for a show. In less than three days I have to have an order ready for my client. In four days I will be leaving to visit my daughter who just had a baby in Kentucky for 10 days, not knowing if I will get a phone call telling me to head back home. (I am driving--900 miles one way..)

I just canceled a few days in NYC with a friend at the end of the month. I feel time slipping away with so much work to be done. School starts the 2nd, and the show is the 4th. And I don't know what it going to happen with my mom. I live a moment at a time.

These little water color sketches were done in Rock Harbor, Cape Cod, in the lovely town of Orleans. I feel like those little trees -- lost in the ocean at high tide, so small, subjected to the elements.

I live for the low tide.



American Fairy Tales said...

Hi Patti,
Wow, sounds like you've got a lot on your plate. I'm really sorry to hear about your mother. Let me just say that I've been in that place and know that the best I can offer is my sympathy, for even though I've been in that place, I'm not sure empathy is valid.

But, you've got some really great bright spots in front of you as well. Your daughter just had a baby (congrats to her), you have an art show coming up, and an eager customer. You also have a couple of wonderful water colors that seem to soothe the soul.

Hope all goes well, and your trip is wonderful.


Sandra Ink said...

Dear Patti,
It's been almost two months since I lost my mom unexpectedly. I can empathize and sympathize with you. Part of what saved me was having made a committment to do handpainted masks for a show that was a charitible fundraiser. While in the midst of making myself sit down and paint, I had time to really think about my mom and how much she means to me. Being over your head can be a blessing sometimes.